Jogging my memory

Running, jogging, what ever it might be called that I did this morning was much more than physical.  I have not been able to really run for any length of time since late 2008.  I was diagnosed with breast cancer and spent the next two years getting my life back physically.  The reconstructive surgery that I had after my bilateral mastectomies has made me feel whole again.  Now please don't get me wrong, there are ladies out there that are living without recon and very happy, I worship them.  For me I found that after three months with no breasts and the ever present scars I personally felt that something was missing.  But I digress.  You see the nature of my surgery caused changes in my muscles of my lower body and made my hip flexers painfully tight.  My feeble attempts earlier to run at all just left me with many trips to PT and WATSU.

We are spending some time in Florida, escaping the cold for a spell and the green grass and warm temperatures have drawn me out.  I put on my runners this am and vowed to slowly run for just 20 minutes.  I only stopped to walk for about five minutes, but I managed to make it home in one piece.
The most interesting part of this event was what happened in my mind.  I will be fifty this year, I don't feel it, when I say it out loud it sounds so foreign to me.  I will say that the way my body feels running is very close to 50, when did everything begin to jiggle so much ???  The rhythm in my breathing, the feel of the pavement, these things all brought me back to the days when I ran swiftly, without tiring, my muscles and flesh felt taut and firm.  It was quite a revelation to me, age, undeniably in my midst.

I will not run and hide from what is approaching, I am embracing it, I am ready, I am determined to be scuba diving in exotic places well into my 70's.  Hey this summer I plan on trying kite surfing.   I am preparing now with healthy eating habits (most of the time) hehe.  Moving my body daily, staying flexible and active, using all that I am able to use before I lose it.  I am TRYING to be kinder to myself, praise myself a bit more, pat myself on the back, and be less of my own worst critic.

I would like to recommend a book for all you ladies, ladies of all ages actually.  I am enjoying it so much that I want to share it with everyone.  Jane Fonda has a new book out, the concept is life has three acts, each act is equivalent to 30  decades (if we are all so lucky).  It is straight forward, easy to follow, and very very workable.  The name of her book is "Prime Time" and has suggestions for eating , exercises , spirit, and mind.  I hope  you enjoy it.

Hugs and kisses